28. The problem with being conditional
I think sometimes we can become quite conditional and before starting things we already have put up some resistance to taking the first step.
I think we can sometimes be like, “Oh, I'm definitely going to start on that project but just once I have more money”, or “I have all the right tools but I’m just so busy”.
We get too conditional with the start.
I have found myself that the more and more I throw that away, start before I’m ready, and just put my head down- the more I realise I can be successful. I am allowing myself so many more opportunities to fail, to learn, to develop habits, and be prepared for the future.
Take for example this blog post; I could be quite conditional and say, “Oh, I need to be sitting at my desk for a nice cup of coffee and a lot of time to achieve anything of value”. And, okay, maybe that will happen once in a while. But 90% of the time, that is not the case.
If I got so conditional about it, I'd never write anything. Yet, it is out of removing the conditions and forcing myself to write every day that content rises to the surface and I have consistent routines.
Today, I had a really interesting occurrence happen to me. I was signed up to do this running race. It was set to start off at 9:15 am and I had previously planned out this very elaborate schedule to wake up, eat, get clothes and bag sorted, go have my coffee, do some stretches, and then go and meet some people to get a minibus there at around 7:30.
But then guess what? My alarm on my phone didn't end up working. I ended up waking up around 8:30 am leaving only had around 45 minutes to get ready and rush to the event which was 25 minutes car journey away.
That left me in a whole bunch of stress.
It was not the perfect conditions that I previously had set out in my mind. So at that point of waking up late, I had two choices; did I just sack off the race and put it down to bad planning or go out and at least attempt to get there and run it. Of course, I could potentially be late, maybe not even be allowed in, and at the very least be very hungry and dehydrated from literally dashing out the door. But no this race was set in my mind. I had it on the calendar, there was a number waiting for me, a medal to be claimed.
Whatever the circumstances I was going to get there.
So after a mad rush and sprinting to the start line, I managed to start the race and complete it relatively well.
I think it's because I simply accepted the fact that this annoying thingg had happened. And I moved on really quickly and adapted. Although the alarm on the phone could be down to a fault of my own (although I blame apple) we need to be okay with things going wrong. Very rarely in life do we have 100% agency over situations.
Things come up and this adaptability has to be a system we have in ourselves.
Don’t get me wrong we can have preferences and ways we like doing things, however, when these don’t go our way we shouldn’t beat ourselves or others up over it. Rather, see it as a learning lesson or even a challenge- you aren’t in your most desirable situation yet you can make the most out of it.
This then leads you to be an inspiration to others. When you are navigating various circumstances in life you make the best of it, no matter the results. That's a sign of a true leader- because nothing can phase you.
When people panic when external situations change you are calm and can guide people through that.
This only happens when you let go of the need to be in control, or at the very least see the benefit when things go against your plan. This is personally something I am working on.
And guess what the flip side of this is? When you get so comfortable with situations being wrong when the conditions are actually right you can make even more of a difference and perform even better. Habits would’ve been formed, the discipline mastered, and excuses eradicated.
Additionally, you will be even more grateful at the end of the day. Why do you think people are so happy in less well-off countries; they don’t rely on external conditions to dictate behavior.
“Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no less of enthusiasm”- Winston Churchill
So don't rely too much on external conditions set on you; and yeah, get a good alarm clock!